Let's hear it for the Vice-President and President of PCP... they're proving themselves to be funny! But then, you already knew they were funny...
This is Top 5 for Tuesday, September 7, 1999. If you want to join the list (and you should, it's funny), here be their webbysite.
16> One less thing for Al Gore to claim he invented.
15> Amble-by shootings just don't send rival gangs the right message.
14> With cars up on blocks in front of every house on the planet, Jeff Foxworthy languishes in obscurity.
13> Parents around the world rejoice as nothing whatsoever on the bus goes 'round and 'round.
12> While much faster than 30 minutes, catapult system for pizza home delivery is still an inexact science.
11> Leather jackets or not, the Hell's Angels are far less intimidating on donkeys.
10> Abundance of gratuitous TV pogo stick chases by Pamela Anderson.
9> Drag racing, while more literal, is markedly less exciting.
8> 95% of retail space taken by Nike, leaving only 5% for Starbucks.
7> Roulette's not quite as exciting with everyone betting on the corners.
6> Major drop in teen pregnancies, as copulating on the back of a horse is not as much fun as it would seem to be.
5> James Dean's death from running head-first into a tree isn't nearly as romantic when there's no car involved.
4> Millions of slovenly hamsters with unsightly love-handles playing video games all day.
3> V_NN_ WH_T_ W_ULD B_ TURN_NG TR_CKS _NST__D _F L_TT_RS
2> Ladies and Gentlemen: His Honor the President... Ted Kennedy!
and Topfive.com's Number 1 Difference if Nobody had Invented the Wheel...
1> Circusgoers marvel as 50 clowns manage to cram themselves into a small horse.
[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]
[ Copyright 1999 by Chris White ]
Guess who contributed #1? Huh? Huh? Give up? The answer is -- US! Random and Napoleon! Well, technically, it was Random. I added a bit of funny wording, but it doesn't show up in the Top5 mailing. Oh, well. Yay Random!
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