Wizardly person: Give me a large enough window and a place to stand,
and I will defenestrate the earth.
Person: Okay, you can stand over there, but I don't know about the
window. But why would you want to do that? Wouldn't that hurt somebody?
Wizardly person: Nah, it would just be defenestraty.
Person: oh okay. I figure the glass might cut someone.
Wizardly person: Nope... defenestrations arenever painful unless you
land on a tactical nuclear weapon that's skulking outside the window.
Person: oh, I hate those skuliking weapons. They're mean.
Wizardly person: And explody, of course.
Person: yeah
Wizardly person: Exploooooooooooooooody!
Person: especially the tactical ones. They're very tactile.
Wizardly person: And explooooooooody.
Person: yeah. That's not healthy for anyone nearby
Wizardly person: Radiation is the key to developing interesting new
appendages.
Person: only used wisely though.
Person: It's also good to mix DNA of people with animals and make
Spidermen and Batmen and Manbats and the like.
Wizardly person: And hedgehogpeople? And sporkboys?
Person: you know about the sporkboys? That was just an idea in our
research and development group...shoot...we have a leak. Okay, I'm sorry,
but you have to die now. Could you stand still for about 5 seconds?
Wizardly person: Absolutely. ::hurls himself through the nearest window::
Person: hey! You moved!
Wizardly person: I did indeed, and am now plummeting to my death.
Wizardly person: ::plummets merrily::
Person: d'oh. Well I guess that works. But you realize you just put
3 good assassins out of work.
Wizardly person: They're quite welcome to join me in plummeting.
Wizardly person: There's a shortage of good plummeters in these parts,
donchaknow.
Person: there are? Well good! I'll give all those unemployed types
jobs for that. $3 for anyone who survives. :)
Wizardly person: ::does a swan dive into a bowl of rice-a-roni and
swims to freedom::
Person: d'oh?
Wizardly person: ::watches the three assassins splatter on the pavement
behind him::
Wizardly person: Yay!
Person: Note: Anyone who makes any liquid of any sort appear beneath
them is void of payment
Person: Note: Any substance that can be swim in is considered a liquid
Wizardly person: Well, rice-a-roni isn't really a... doh.
Person: heehee. :)
Wizardly person: ::throws noodlebombs at you::
Person: But at least you're alive. :)
Person: ACK!
Person: *ducks one and gets hit on the head by another*
Person: *explodes in a pool of noodles and bombs*
Wizardly person: Your noodle has been bombed.
Person: So it has
Wizardly person: Everyone wants a log...
Person: beeflog?
Wizardly person: Sqrxl.
Person: cheeselog?
Wizardly person: Noodleheimer.
Person: d'oh?
Wizardly person: Dohlog!
Person: heehee
Wizardly person: Squarelog.
Wizardly person: Spongebob Squarepants!
Person: ACK! NO!!
Wizardly person: Snorks?
Person: Smurfsnorks?
Wizardly person: Schneedleborklesnorks.
Person: ackinborklesnorklefnorks?
Wizardly person: Huzzoodleblinkineiglefroonyfjords.
Person: ack!
Wizardly person: Rather.
Person: rather indeed
Wizardly person: Indeed, rather than inword?
Person: isn't it inward or is it in a word?
Wizardly person: It isn't inward, it's in word without a space, because
it was eaten by rabid froonysnarks.
Person: sounds painful
Wizardly person: Spacectomies are quite painful, and frequently fatal.
Person: I can imagine
Person: It does generally kill the words.
Wizardly person: You can also run through that there window at top
velocity.
Person: Unless you get it all right, alright?
Wizardly person: ::throws the window at you, instead, effectively
defenestrating you quite thoroughly::
Person: d'oh. I've just been defenestrated.
Wizardly person: Indeed you have, Senor Trianglepants.
Person: triangle? But I'm wearing short pants!
Wizardly person: Last names do not always reflect reality, as a famous
but never-aired Mercedes commercial states.
Person: d'oh?
Wizardly person: Thoroughly and completely.
Person: I see.
Wizardly person: I don't, and for that reason I must leave momentarily.
Person: alrighty then
Wizardly person: I'm suffering from sudden, spasmodic seizures of
the eyebrows.
Person: what seized them?
Wizardly person: ::arches an eyebrow rather suddenly at you, then
winces and says 'Ow, my pancreas.'::
Person: wow. Sounds bad.
Wizardly person: My pancreas is eating me.
Person: tell it to stop
Wizardly person: It has no ears, strangely enough.
Person: oh. Then....give it subliminal massages.
Wizardly person: I'm afraid that would be inappropriate.
Wizardly person: Have you ever read Flatland?
Person: nope
Wizardly person:
ftp://ftp.datacanyon.com/pub/gutenberg/etext95/flat10a.txt
Wizardly person: Eet's very eenteresting.
Wizardly person: Explains, by analogy, what the fourth dimension is
like.
Wizardly person: And is an amusing social satire at the same time.
Person: Wow...that's long.
Wizardly person: It's a small novel.
Person: ack.
Wizardly person: Is worth reading, thoug.
Person: it's been bookmarked. I canna read it now
Wizardly person: Err... yay?
Wizardly person: I assume by 'canna' you mean something other than
'cannae', which is short for 'cannot'?
Wizardly person: Or do I assume incorrectly?
Wizardly person: Or is that a window beckoning to me over there?
Person: It's scottish for I cannot.
Person: heehee
Person: (scottish accent that is)
Wizardly person: It's bookmarked, so you can't read it?
Wizardly person: And I usually write that as cannae.
Person: No, it's bookmarked so I can read it later cuz I cannot now
Wizardly person: Oh, bork.
Wizardly person: Oooh, window.
Person: Well I don't like putting a's before e's cuz it just looks
odd.
Wizardly person: It's scottish.
Person: it's silly
Wizardly person: It is indeed.
Person: ae ae ae ae ae ae ack!
Wizardly person: Aieeeeee!
Person: yeah
Wizardly person: Ork.
Person: snork?
Wizardly person: Bjorkn.
Person: bork? Spork? Fork? Which is it man!??!?!?
Person: FJORK!
Wizardly person: Kabork.
Person: ackork?
Wizardly person: Kasneedlezork.
Person: too many orks!
Wizardly person: Kork.
Person: d'ohork
Wizardly person: Don't call me a d'ohork, you spork.
Person: sorryork
Wizardly person: It's quite kablinkyork.
Person: heeheeork
Wizardly person: Zanzibork.
Person: I seeork
Wizardly person: Are you sure of thatork?
Person: I don't knowork
Person: I don't knork either.
Wizardly person: K'Z'Kork?
Person: der....ork?
Wizardly person: Pretty muchork.
Person: d'oh.....ork
Wizardly person: Orkork.
Person: I gots to goork
Wizardly person: Kbyeork.